When love is part of your life there is an added sense of being, be it for another or yourself. The elevation of elation heightens the senses above a natural state. I do not know the scientific termination but the physical feeling brings more of everything to life. Nowadays my children are beginning to forge a furrow in the field of life and I can adjust to each passing day with the knowledge I have gained while bringing them to where they now find themselves. My time when I would do every thing for them without thanks aids me in the here and now, the same application is in effect. Today my son was on the phone to his mother and asked to talk to me, wanting to know why I allow his little sister to sit in pubs on a weekend night. Can I say that his “little” sister is seventeen years old, eighteen in a couple of months. Last night when she informed me she was going out and “may” be back tonight but “maybe” not, her mother reminded me that my son had been allowed a certain leeway, leaving me to accept I give my daughter the same space. A fortnight ago my girl stayed out all night for the first time, and I was made aware she would be staying with a male. After a deal of soul searching and a little advice from the mother of my daughter, I came to the realisation that my girl was a woman. Or from now on I will be treating her as a woman. She attends local college, five days a week, and since we understood the nightmare she went through due to having  access to the internet  through her mobile phone, she is a completely changed personality. Her beautiful smile has returned and she is helpful and thoughtful, so a lot changed in a short period of time. My son stays at University for much of the year, thirty five miles away in Liverpool, so do not get to see him often although we talk and text plenty. The love of football gives us reason to stay in touch apart from the usual father son stuff, He is a busy man, working part time, studies and research, plus going to the gym six days a week. He right now is 5′ 10″, to my 5’6″ and I think it is because since the day he could walk he has been incredibly active. He is muscled in a coordinated fashion rather than a big bulging state, I am incredibly proud of how he goes about his affairs, he has one girl and to my knowledge does not stray and apparently neither does his girl, who is a nice person, I have met her many times now.  People often use the phrase “blame the parents” when discussing a wayward child, I like to think the same applies when the child is a godsend. I mean once in temper my son shouted at me, “i am only going uni to get away from you”! seriously, at the time I thought to myself, “if that is true then brilliant” I achieved a goal by default and I see no problem there. I only want what they want, and I have to treat them with the same attitude. Although I can advise I cannot direct, we do not come from a long line of banking families where rules of engagement are written in some invisible book of honour and process. No, we are a modern family whereby we use the love we hold for each other with the respect we hold for each to live their life as they see fit, to keep us locked together although not physically, but spiritually, as a family.  My daughter just reminded what that can mean as she barged in on me while I am writing and asked me to make her a cup of tea cos she is going to bed, I offered in ten minutes to give myself time to finish this post. She marched back upstairs cursing, trials of living with a teenage daughter.

I passed the phone back to the mother of my son, after telling him, “she is my daughter and I hear lots I don’t want to, but I have to deal with it so don’t tell me how to deal with her, talk to your mum, its mother’s day”  My daughter has the need to tell me about her nights out when there is a lot I would be ok with not hearing but I am her only outlet most of the time so I endure. I don’t do mother’s day but make sure my kids do. Happy mothers day to all who earned the title.



Fifteen years old, living in Hulme, Manchester, Saturday afternoon walking down Stretford road with mates on our way to the match. Manchester United at Old Trafford, tickets cost a tenner and once a month dad let me go with my older bigger mates. We were two blacks, one mixed race, one white, and we stood on the left side of the Stretford end. We let it be known by chanting “we are the left side” while the chant came back at us “we are the right side”

Standing in the Stretford end was always a little bit scary for a small teen, only because of the way the crowd surged forward and downward when United scored a goal. The only thing stopping total carnage were the barriers that were set up along the steps. After a goal it was total hysteria on the Stretford end, jumping and shouting and hugging your mates, there was nothing like it for the thrill. Round about ’79 the team that were regular champions of England were the team that were United’s main rivals and still are today. Liverpool, thirty five miles up the motorway won all there was to win back then, and had some of the finest players in the country, even the world. It was an actual sin to like an opposing player but a player from your main rivals was a no no, I kept it quiet but my favourite player was Kenny Dalglish. The Scottish forward brought to Liverpool to replace the legend that was Kevin Keegan, who was moving on to Germany. United fans were happy to see him go and actually believed Liverpool would be a weaker team without him, but Kenny came down from Celtic for a record, £550,000, and Liverpool went on to dominate English football for another ten years. Kenny Dalglish was a phenomenal player and won every trophy going with Liverpool. The club always recruited players that went on to fit into the team seamlessly, they won four European cups in seven years, Kenny Dalglish scored the winner in a 1-0 win against Malmo, I remember it well, Liverpool dominated the match and peppered the goal with shot after shot only to be denied by the Malmo keeper who was having the game of his life. The ball was slipped into the area for King Kenny to move onto and as the keeper came at him the obvious solution was to shoot at the angle but Kenny watched the goalie go down sliding toward him and gently lifted it over his advancing body. The ball bobbed along the line before crossing the line into the net. Kenny turned arms outstretched, massive grin on his face and another European cup was in the Anfield trophy cabinet. You could not help but admire him as a footballer, and as the years passed Liverpool signed a young Welshman named Ian Rush who would play at the top. Kenny moved back a place and the partnership went on to destroy teams, Kenny would find a pass to send Rush in on goal, or follow up and score himself, it was never a one man team, Kenny was a team player first, and humble with it, a magician.

The times I regularly went to Old Trafford were those when Liverpool dominated the game but it was still a powerful experience watching the red devils play. Our manager was Tommy Docherty who had put together a team that excited the fans. Two wingers and an attacking philosophy that United fans always demanded, it was a really good team. The keeper Alex Stepney was a stalwart, Martin Buchan the lynchpin, centre half, whose song was “Martin Buchan is cooler than the Fonz” kept the tempo going forward. The wingers were Stevie Coppell on the right and Gordon Hill (Merlin) on the left. I will never forget the semi final of the FA cup at Villa Park where Hill picked up the ball on the edge of the box and swung a sweet left foot shot into the top corner. The manager had a habit of taking him off when things were going bad but on the right wing Coppell was a regular 8/10 player, never letting his standard drop. Eventually playing for his country, England.

The only trophy United won during that era was the FA cup in 1977, and in the final they played their greatest rivals in football, Liverpool. There was an added gloss to be had by winning the cup on that day, United could stop Liverpool achieving winning the treble, league and cup and European cup. United fans needed to win the cup so badly, to be beaten by Liverpool would be unbearable, so along with the wanting there was a feeling of nervousness intertwined. The match was not an epic but when the ball was flicked on to Stuart Pearson in the first half the United fans all stood up and watched as he glanced at the net and struck a low shot across Clemence in the scouse goal. Eruption as the ball rippled the netting, songs sang at full volume, Wembley was rocking on the United half. United fans jeered the Liverpool fans mercilessly until bang, Liverpool equalised. Then it was the turn of the Liverpool fans to be heard singing at full blast, United sang back, it was hectic. On the pitch United were attacking Liverpool again, the ball landed at the feet of Lou Macari, midfield dynamo, he looked up to see Jimmy Greenhoff holding a Liverpool player at bay with his back, instantly he shot but it was a bad shot and was heading well wide until it struck the chest of Greenhoff and left the Liverpool keeper stranded. It was the ugliest goal, but the United players ran off celebrating as if it was a worldy, some to Macari some to Greenhoff. The United fans were delirious as the final whistle blew and they were the victors. To beat your closest rivals in the final of a major competition is as good as it gets, and the rivalry between United and Liverpool is legendary, there is no love lost between the two sets of fans, in fact it would not be out of place to suggest they hate each other, with a passion. The journey back North for United fans was amazing while Liverpool still had an European cup final to focus on which they went on to win. There has only ever been one team to win the treble, league, cup, European cup in the same season, if not for United it would have been Liverpool who held that historic distinction, instead in 1999 United, who had followed on from Liverpool to dominate the nineties, won the league, the FA cup and the European cup to complete a feat that has not been done by any other team in the history of the league. Nowadays the stadiums are different, the European cup is the Champions league, and neither Liverpool or United are at the top of the tree in England but still when they play each other in the league it is a match that everybody wants to see. The rivalry is so entrenched in the British game that the fixture stands out from all the others, this Saturday afternoon coming they clash again and the football world is waiting anticipating, hoping for a game of epic proportions and with the players on view there is every chance they will get it, Mo Salah, Lukaku, Firminio, Sanchez, the players are top notch and the rivalry carries on, I am looking forward to this one, again.


Sleep soundly angel, I yearn to quest plans on the table, wire and cable  twisted Into fire and ice. I visit elicit rendezvous I am  the centre of it, crusader sword well worn and illicit,  enemy at the door blood covers the floor seeping through mosaic flooring, there for all is the physical warning. Whispers and truths are boring, ancestors crying and calling, steeples falling, immense creatures rising, like human eels quite frightening. I swing and decapitate, hordes of monsters pour through the gates, smells foul too late to berate, try and help me, any one friendly, any one friend me. Carry me gently, sleep overcomes me angels tell me, sleep well  my baby, ignore the lazy, build your wall, immensely


Where will the turn enter, rampage at the epicentre, deceit lent with gusto.                         Problems to the south, east and west, horned creatures battle in contest. Fire raging at extreme unusual temperatures, Sick twisted art and cold ugly literatures. Hidden symbols with political significance, worship with religious  reverence. Blood spilled my arms covered in red magnificence,  cordite and incense. Wallow wailing women carry vital evidence, all around the world lost sense, tense. Brutal youthful, beautiful, egged on school full. Loosen journey entry blurry, untruths make youths. Rivers of people, dark clouds carry evil, emanating signal, mindful control. A million lost souls, domains taken and captured, size dwarfing the start up. Temples and cathedrals, lands and castles, bones hollow rattles in dead of night, power out right.  Ruthless and reckless, bold adventurous, after an inch and a mile, leery sick smiles. Impale the world as it spins, let the chips fall where they will, two sets of twins. One for each vision, watch closely when you look at your television. Listen, howls and screams, foul stinking fiends, rotting as they shuffle, every one has a double, it began in a bubble. Execute the struggle, an entire army, turned on me, surrounded on every side, stripped flesh from my hide, steel pierced me, no place to hide, I knelt and offered up words to the skies. At the end of the day we all die.