Fam,

What does that mean, right? Family, family, family. To some the word heals worlds, equally no more than a knowing nod, and then even it can be a mystery to add that want.    Always had an eye for a girl, didn’t take much for me to notice, no offence not trying to blow this at the start but I am truly talking from the heart, so my bad if you feel this, no agenda just the real biz. The buzz got me running about two mile one night. Young, fifteen, in the park with a girl, I didn’t want to go home, kinda felt like we was both grown, just talking and looking at each other, my eyes gave me vibes I can never explain but trust I wasn’t leaving till I could not stay no more, I was proper done for, and that is the other memory from that day, for all the pleasure there came a price to pay. A constant theme throughout but you know, like being in Hulme back then, good friends, young, Lesley, in the evenings Red Admiral, Mikey, Nutty, Denzil, and that chase when the heart is throbbing, playing grabbing, laughing, so so young now, back then it was everything means everything, so funny, she was my first real honey. Met the family. It was real like a love affair, just because I met someone else, did not mean I didn’t care, “course I did, kinda like a first love”  Even when we just hugged it felt real good. Back then, I had certain way of behaving, called lying, and I wasn’t mostly trying, started as a means of self esteem but led to a person had no problem lying, meaning he had no sympathy or empathy, he so very trying, am I lying? In the club every night, it was like two lives. I was good I suppose, imagine the lies and the smiles and being alert, 24/7. Wrong wrong I have a teenage daughter and I would go mad if she met an idiot like me, now I see many things that back then I couldn’t see, but this aint “woe is me” I am good. I know there is no mystery.  Too young and definitely irresponsible fact of the matter modern cliché but hey, I am celebrating beauty, everyone was a cutie, and the truth is, buses to Wythenshaw man yeah, us kids. We grew from kids having kids, how does that go? Well we all know but it is what it was, there is no because, it just was.

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